My dad had moved back home to try and get back with my mother I had also moved back home after a disastrous first time living with Graham hadn't worked out.
My dad had come home in a rotten mood and sat me down and said I was to get a proper job or move out and I called him a bastard as he had a cheek telling me to move out when I had literally picked him up off the floor of a telephone box one night when Graham and I were living together and took him into our home when he had no where else to go.
All of a sudden he started saying he had a bad headache and couldn't breathe and had to go to bed my mother said "oh he's just faking it trying to get attention" but something was different. My father never went to bed and never faked being ill.
All of a sudden my mother starting screaming and said he was unresponsive and I called a doctor (when you could call out doctors like that) the doctor gave him an injection of pain relief and said he would be fine but my mother was still screaming the house down so I called the ambulance service I didn't know at 20 what else to do as I had a screaming idiot running round the house like a headless chicken who wasn't making the situation any easier. I went in to see my dad and it is like he had aged literally right in front of my eyes.
The ambulance came and they defibrillated him on the floor and worked on him for a long time. The room was packed with people crying and screaming Graham was there and my sisters boyfriend and my mother all just not knowing what to do. I had to do everything.
My dad sadly died right in front of me as they couldn't save him from the massive heart attack which he had had. Apparently it was his second heart attack and no one had known that he'd had a first one.
Once the undertakers had been my mother rushed out of the house along with my sister and they went off and stayed at friends houses. Literally you couldn't make this shiz up seriously. I had to do all the ringing around to family members to let them know that my dad had sadly passed away.
My nan said "oh but you called him a bastard in an argument" well cheers Nan just what I needed to hear when I was trying to hold everything together at the time.
Graham and I ended up staying at a friends the night also me just in shock at what had just happened.
My mother went on to try and blame the first doctor who had come and looked at him and gave him pain relief but that didn't really go anywhere in the end and the doctor was told he had done what he could for my dad on the night.
I never got to say sorry to him for calling him a bastard and I blamed myself for a long time afterwards as to whether it was my fault in some way as to his death. I am a lot more comfortable with my decisions on that night now and who was to know that my dad was going to die right in front of us after a silly argument.
Nothing was ever the same when my dad died and my mother who was already a monster turned into a demon overnight.
He had a beautiful funeral and as a Police Officer he had a full coppers funeral which was greatly appreciated.
Never let a day go by you do not tell your loved ones how much they mean to you if I could just go back in time I may not have saved him but I sure would not have argued with him they way I had done that night.
RIP Dad very much missed since September 1992
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