Now a Gym Member

So as I previously said I would update you and have now joined the gym and am a fully fledged member but baby steps I am not going to throw myself into it madly and am going to go a couple of times a week at the moment and maybe at the weekend.

I will build myself up as I am quite overweight at the moment and do not want to do myself a mischief and then go back to square one where I am not able to go to the gym at all.

I was very nervous when I walked in but this gym is quite small and I like that it is never too busy and the people there seem very nice and not judgemental at all. I am hoping I can just go in do my thing and over time rebuild the confidence I have lost due to weight gain and my mental health.

The good thing is the gym is literally five minutes from me so I can walk there and back if I am feeling confident stepping outside. I usually use my car for everything if and when I have to go out due to my agoraphobia that I suffer.

My family think I am exaggerating about my weight but to me I am not and it does need to improve as I am getting back pain again due to gaining and that is usually when I know that I have put on the pounds and need to lose weight. It isn't going to go away by itself and I need to take action now it is very early days and I know that I may have a few bumps in the road along the way but taking the first step is the main thing and I am feeling a little proud of myself for (a) getting out of the house to even join the gym and (b) taking the decision to improve myself.

I am hoping that my mental health will improve as my self esteem improves. I have tried all sorts and I am on medication but this medication makes me put weight on and I do if I am honest comfort eat a lot but I am fed up of feeling sorry for myself due to my disability and I am determined this time to lose the weight I have put on and improve my mind and body.

As I said baby steps at the moment and I will as always keep you updated on my journey.